The Forbidden Couple's Safe Place

 Can I stop being in pain?

I don't think you can, right? It's a part of life after all. All I want to know is, can I still get better despite being so... sensitive in life? I'm so stupid and clumsy all the time and it probably makes some people won't trust me after this. It feels like I am not built for the current state of the world right now. I might as well be in the wrong place, in the wrong time.

It's fine. I guess it's fine. There's something else. Something that kept me going, something that kept me holding tightly to all my means. I don't want all of this to be over yet. There is something that I must fulfill, and I will never get enough of it until the day I die. All the words are true, and the prophecy aligns.

[9:41 PM]

Under any circumstances, I am grateful. I am glad to be alive and survived just well enough to get through another day. This may not be the last of my struggling days, but it surely is nice to know that you can take a break, eventually. At the end of the day. No matter how bad the damage was, I am at least glad it was over.

 I will take a more freestyle approach of writing, and this time it'll be about how much I can adore without any help from the so-called "intelligences". Bleh, those people made me lose it! Anyway, there's something I've been forgetting in mind, and it's actually quite bad that I haven't been able do bringing it back to life... it's CREATIVITY!

Where the HELL did I lose my creativity on the road to success?? Have I truly forgotten who I really was, because I was too busy chasing success? What was I doing!? What have I been doing? I can't remember a thing that I've been doing. It burns. The silence of my mind, it burns. I would do anything to stop this burning silence in my mind. It's so hollow, I started to choke by the lack of air.

I will be a [[REAL BOY]]

 Uhhh this is my first post? I never done this before and I actually didn't know what to write so uhh I'll just write whatever I'm feeling right now and uhh my English is very broken but whatever because I'm in badmood right now eheheh...  QwQ ;;

My sleep schedule is very broken that I usually sleep in the afternoon at 10-12 AM but since my friend let me borrow her Steam account so I get excited to play one of the game I really wanted to play called Inzoi because I have no money to buy it myself, the graphics are broken for some reason but at least it's not laggy and I'm enjoying it so far :"3

And uhhh I usually waking up at 7 pm but my parents are arguing and screaming and it makes me jump out of the bed and uhh my sick father want me to feed him but he doesn't let me to take a bath and I thought I wouldn't be able to take a bath or eat tonight and I don't even have a lunch... But yeah I finally free from that because of my mom TwT

Then uhh I was so excited to play Inzoi again... Buuut my brother is using the PC and he plays multiple games at once that the CPU is very very hot, I played Inzoi but it doesn't even feel hot, and then I feel really sad and in badmood eheh... I know I'm always being so dramatic, but it's because I can't play that game on my friend account forever, I eventually will stop playing, but I don't even have money to buy that game

I might not be able to play that game for I don't know how long because I'm so broke ;w; And uhh all my progress will be gone when I have to return the game... I feel excited but also very sad, that game is always kind of a game genre I always wanted, I just need a place to comfort myself from real world, and I'll have to go to college in a week so I feel like I'm gonna feel very very down... Ehehe :"3

I'm just gonna watch some gameplays right now huweeehh QwQ